What message did the movie 'Precious' give you?

What does nappy rootz mean to you?

If I don't get myself together, he will leave me.

 Blog on the questions asked or blog any thoughts you have on this subject.

Discussion topics

When a man cheat, is it his woman's fault?

Why/why not?

Some women fell responsable when their man cheats.  Why do you think she feels responsible?

Sometime when a woman finds out her man is cheating, she make extensive changes to herself. 

She  may diet, work out, buy new clothes etc.

Do you think this will prevent her man from cheating again.?

Why/why not?

NO RACE, NOT EVEN THE BLACK RACE, RESPECT THE BLACK RACE

I was passing a service station on Montpellier Avenue in Macon, Georgia when I saw a small group of black people picketing.

I stopped and asked them why were they picketing?

They said the owner-oriental male- had slapped a little black girl.

The picketers were asking the customers-only black customers shop there- to boycott the store and told them why.

While I was there, every black customer they approached ignored them, went inside and shopped.

Discussion topics:

Do you think the storeowner would have slapped a little white girl?

Why or why not,

If he would have slapped a little white girl, what do you think the reaction of the white people would have been?

Why do you think the black customers decided to continue to shop there even though they knew the owner had slapped a little black girl?

When a man puts on his finest and prepares to step out, someone usually says, "Man you are Dressed to kill."

Parents often ask me to go to court with them and their juvenile.

On Wednesday July 6, a young man was standing before the judge. He was accused of shooting someone from a 'rival' gang.

His 400 dollar tennis shoes, 5 or 6 hundred dollar outfit and jewelry galore were pitifully impressive.

Uncomfortable under the judge's intense stare, the young man turned his eyes to the crowd. Our eyes happen to meet. Or, perhaps the compassion he felt in my energy caused his eyes to seek my eyes.

'Oh great universe,' my soul whimpered as our energy merged.

There was no one there. What should have been a child was just an empty shell, a hollowed out gourd, a dead man walking.

This young man was well-groomed on the outside but uncombed on the inside.

No one had taken the time to dress this young man on the inside.

Love, affection, and the guidance needed to make it in life were denied him.

By giving our children material things, we feel it 'makes up' for our emotional neglect.

The inside is what needs to be cultivated.

We need to:

1. Nurture our children with love so they will be able to handle outside rejections.

2. Equip our children with guidance so they will be able to understand the importance of leadership.

3. Give our children compassion so they can be patient and understanding with their fellowman.

4. Tell our children daily how valuable they are and how important it is to live life to the fullest so they will appreciate themselves and life.

If we give our children these things, their insides will be as dressed as their outside.

But, when we send them out dapper on the outside yet empty on the inside, we are just ensuring that our youth are 'DRESSED TO KILL.'

Discussion topics:

Why do you suppose many African Americans buy expensive clothes for their children?

Why do you suppose many African Americans will live in substandard or low income homes but spend 300 dollars on a pair of shoes or put 3,000 dollars worth of rims on a 400 dollar car?

What do you suppose can be done to change detrimental behavior among African Americans?

Revelation 21:8

All my life I was told that lying is wrong.

"God hates a liar, all liars go to hell."

This has been yelled from pulpits, homes, street corners and every other place where people are.

The more I study the bible, the more I wonder if lying is as bad as I have been told it is.

Case and point:

Esau and Jacob Geneses 27

Jacob and his mother Rebekah lied and deceived Isaac into thinking Jacob was Esau.

Rebekah put Esau's clothes on Jacob. She put the skins of the kids of the goats upon Jacob's hands and upon the smooth of his neck.

When Jacob took the meat to Issac, Issac asked him how did he get the meat so quickly.

Jacob's reply was, "Because the Lord thy God brought it to me." (A lie on God.)

Isaac again had doubts that this was Esau so he asked directly, "Are you my very son Esau?"

Jacob answered, "I am."

Here we have an example of one of if not the greatest blessing in the bible given to a liar.

Discussion topics:

Why do you suppose God allowed Jacob to deceive Isaac and steal Esau's birthright?

If one of your responses is that Jacob did not steal the birthright, Esau gave it to him, talk on this discussion topic.

If the birthright was rightly Jacob's, why did he and his mother have to lie and deceive Isaac to receive it?

I was looking at one of the cable channel when I saw a couple on there talking about what they called marital aids.

It did not take me long to realize that their marital aids were your run of the mill sex toys.

The host asked them if they ever buy these marital aids from porn shops or online adult stores.

These Christians became so offended I thought they were going to walk off the show.

They said they would never go into any of those stores because they are porn and smut. They went on to say how God would punish them if they went into those type stores.

The couple said they have someone come into their home and display the marital aids to them.

The host asked how is that different from going into the stores.

The couple said the items they buy are the same as the items in the porn stores but the items delivered to their homes have pictures of roses on them instead of pictures of naked people.

These Christians were buying the same sex toys that are sold in porn shops but they said it was different with them because they did not buy them from a smut shop.

"Marital aids help us stay faithful to each other." The husband said.

Discussion topics:

Is using sex toys a sin?

Explain your answer.

If you said yes, what if you have them home delivered, with roses on the box instead of naked pictures? Is it still a sin?

If you say it is a sin, give scriptures.

If I wanted to commit adultery and the person and I wore church clothes, and kept them on during the act instead of getting naked, does that make adultery not a sin?

If a well dressed man sitting in a nice comfortable home have stolen merchandise brought to his home, does that make stealing not a sin?

Explain your answer.

The husband said the 'marital aids' help them stay faithful to each other.

Are sex toys stronger than the Holy Spirit or the power of God?

Should this couple's commitment to God and themselves cause them to be faithful to each other?

He beat me for breakfast, lunch and dinner

A woman told me that her husband beat her for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

I told her that he should beat her for morning and evening snacks also.

She said she could not believe I said that. Then she started talking about she was a victim of the Battered women Syndrome.

I told her she was a victim of the Damn Fool Syndrome.

A battered woman chooses to be battered.

How are you going to stay with a man you know beats you and act surprised when he beats you?

Or, even more puzzling is why you stay with a man who beats you.

I am sick and tired of taxpayers' dollars being wasted on women who allow themselves to be battered.

Some of these women go from safe house to their house to safe house to their house and so on.

Some women have utilized every safe house in their immediate area and have utilized many safe houses in surrounding areas, only to go right back to the abuser.

I worked at a safe house.

The first rule is secrecy. During orientation, the women are told not to tell anyone where this place is. That rule was posted throughout the building and was reiterated in our daily group meeting.

One of the biggest problems we had at the safe house was women's men showing up

The incident that sticks out most in my mind is the time I walked out of my office and saw a husband standing in the hallway armed as if he was going to invade some poor country.

His wife had called him and told him the location of the safe house. He had come to take her out of there.

We were being held captive by a crazed, armed, husband and the director kept talking about protocol.

We had to be careful about calling the police and then only certain polices were allowed to come because after all, we must protect the battered woman at all times.

It took almost 18 hours for the negotiation team to convince that crazed, armed, husband to come out with his hands up.

The woman who called her husband was moved to another safe house at taxpayer's expense.

This woman put every woman housed there as well as every staff there in danger. She put the police officers who came there in danger also.

And I am suppose to feel sympathy for her? I think not.

There is no such thing as a battered woman syndrome.

The battered woman syndrome is something that is used to make money off women.

There is a syndrome for everything now.

Discussion Topics:

Do you think a battered woman gets what she deserves?

Explain your answer.

Why do you suppose a woman stays with a man who batters her?

Do you think society conditions a woman to be battered? Why or why not

Should taxpayers pay for safe houses for battered women? Why or why not

Should taxpayers continue to pay for a battered woman who go back and forth from her husband to the safe house to her husband to the...?

If you said no, how many times, if any, should taxpayers pay for a battered woman to live in a safe house?

Is there such a thing as a battered woman syndrome?

Explain your answer.

Malcolm X

Mention that name today in the 21st century. And, depending on who you mention it to, you will get this reaction:

"Don't mention that evil man to me."  "He taught hate."

"God took that evil man away from us." "Malcolm X was bad for our race."

"Malcolm X divided the race,"  "I don't want to hear nothing about Malcolm X."

A George Wallace campaign bus stopped at a chicken shack in Macon, Georgia.

The only people on the bus, other than George Wallace, were black people. I went over and started talking to them. They were singing George Wallace's praises and talking about how great it is that the races can work together.

I slide in a comment about Malcolm X to see what reaction I would get.

"Malcolm X talked about the races working together." I said.

The whole energy of the crowd changed. They started calling him Satan and saying how they did not want to hear anything about a person who is as evil and hateful as Malcolm X.

"Malcolm X tried to divide the races but God wouldn't let him." One bus rider said.

I asked how did Malcolm X try to divide the race.

No definitive answer was given.

I asked specific questions.

"Did Malcolm X appoint himself registrar of a university to block nine black students from registering?"

"Did Malcolm X say segregation now, segregation forever?"

"Did Malcolm X say integration over my dead body?"

"Did Malcolm X, as Governor of Selma, Alabama, prevent Civil Rights marchers from leaving Selma, Alabama?"

"Did Malcolm X order his troops to beat a group of peaceful Civil Rights marchers?"

Of course the answer to all these questions are no.

These were things that were said and done by George Wallace.

Before leaving, I asked them what made them decide to support George Wallace.

They said, "You cannot keep holding stuff against people for what they did. George Wallace did all that stuff in the past. We can't keep living in the past."

Malcolm X never bombed any little girls to death. Nor did he turn dogs and water hoses on children.

Malcolm X never hanged anybody nor burned their homes to the ground.

Yet Malcolm X is called evil, racist, and many other negative names.

Those George Wallace supporter left without any enlightment.

Does hearing this make you ask, how did that happen?

Discussion topics:

How did Malcolm X become the bad guy?

Why do you suppose African Americans remember and bring up everything another African American has done but 'forget' every thing white people have done?

Are African Americans under a spell or just crazy as hell?

If you said African Americans are under a spell, how did African Americans come under this spell?

Do you suppose there will ever come a time when African Americans are free from the spell?

If you said African Americans are crazy as hell, why do you say this?

Is there anyway for African Americans to become 'sane'?

Parenting

Parenting is the most challenging yet rewarding job there is.

You are entrusted with the molding of a mind.

Unfortunately, too many of us fail to see the importance of shaping the future.

Sometimes it seems as if we think everything else is more important than our children.

We are honored by society as being super parents because of the many hours we

spend away from our children. We bring work home, eat in front of the

computer and -oh yeah-peck our children on the check as they go to bed.

However, we fail to see the association between super parenting and wayward kids.

We can?t raise our children via remote control. 

Cellular phones, beepers and designer e-mail addresses are what we give them. Our

affection, our time and our guidance are what they desire and need most.

Amassing a fortune is more important than nurturing our gems (our children).

Our children?s acting up is not our fault now is it? After all, didn?t the law say we

Can not discipline them?

We become so law abiding when it comes to doing constructive things such as rasing our children to be Why is that?

Consider this; some of the same parents who say they can?t discipline their children because the law say they can?t, embezzle money,<Didn?t the law say you can?t do that?> sell , <Didn?t the law say you can?t do that?> drive drunk, run boot leg houses, shoot and kill any and everybody and do just about any other thing the law says they can?t do.

Yet we become so ?upstanding? when it comes to raising our children.

Our children are going down hill through a chicken yard because

we come up with all these reasons why we can?t discipline our children.

                         Our  priorities are out of order here. 

Our children?s well being should be put ahead of , money and other worldly possessions?

I for one believe the law should be obeyed.  However, if you?re going to break the law, why not break it doing something constructive.

Disciplining our children is constructive because it helps our children learn to obey laws and respect the rights of others.

Yet we continue to allow our children to run wild and destroy themselves as well as others.

Actually the law never said you can?t discipline your children, the law said you can?t abuse your child.

Parents, let?s stop making excuses and start doing what we know is not only right but necessary